LGBTQIA+ affirmative counseling across the state of Missouri.
Find the joy in your LGBTQIA+ identity.
You've had to sacrifice living authentically to protect yourself, and you've had enough.
Being LGBTQIA+ can make it feel like you’re living two completely separate lives. There’s a constant juggling act between two different parts of you: the part that suppresses your queerness out of fear that your boss or Aunt Judy would criticize you for it (or worse), and the part that yearns to live authentically, with pride.
It feels like these two sides of you can never agree, so you’re constantly left wondering: Which side is the real me? Am I “gay enough”? Is there something wrong with me? Am I going to have to hide forever?
It’s been hard for you to find places where you can fully express yourself. You might know some people, whether online or in-person, that you can talk to about your LGBTQIA+ identity. When it comes to finding actual help, though? It’s fallen short.
Therapists, doctors, psychiatrists - Maybe you’ve tried talking with them before to understand your struggles better, but more often than not you’ve gotten the ‘ick’ from them and never went back.
Maybe you’ve noticed other signs that you’re struggling with being LGBTQIA+, too. It pops up in so many places, such as:
Constantly holding your tongue when people are talking about their views about the LGBTQIA+ community because you don’t want to ‘out’ yourself.
Thoughts race whenever you think of going to new places or meeting new people because you’ve been treated poorly in the past.
Your being LGBTQIA+ is always the elephant in the room at family gatherings. You’d rather do almost anything than deal with unsupportive family members.
Being LGBTQIA+ directly conflicts with how you were raised, most likely in a very religious environment. How can I have both?
Having no idea how to find spaces where you can meet and get the support of other LGBTQIA+ folks.
Every time you see a political message that’s discriminatory, dread hits you in the gut. How much longer are our rights going to hold up? What do I do if they’re taken away?
Managing so much of your time and energy trying to manage living a double life is draining you. You’re ready to live fully and authentically as yourself.
How LGBTQIA+ affirmative therapy can help:
Picture a life where you can feel a sense of inner peace and authenticity about your queer identity, no matter if you’re just now exploring it or have always known. You know who and where you can go to get support when you need it, from people who truly get it. It’s easier to speak up when people put you down for your LGBTQIA+ identity.
When people don’t accept you, you know it’s because of them, not you. Now you know you can show up to Pride or other LGBTQIA+ events knowing you belong there - And in the rest of the world, too.
What you hear in the news about how LGBTQIA+ rights are changing doesn’t stop bothering you, but you know how to cope with the anxiety and you know how to keep yourself safe when needed. That, and you know things can change. For the better.
Being LGBTQIA+ still has its challenges, but you can face them with more confidence and still feel a sense of joy with your identity.
Here’s how it works:
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Break down the pain points.
We’ll work together to identify the parts of being LGBTQIA+ that are the hardest for you, ranging from self-acceptance to coming out to dealing with discrimination and beyond.
We’ll also spend some time understanding more about your current struggles, like where they come from and how they’re impacting your life now.
No matter where you are on your journey, knowing where you want to go will help us get to where you want to be.
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Build yourself up.
This sometimes means chipping away at the things that aren’t working, too, such as beliefs you’ve learned from how the rest of the world has treated you to looking at places and/or relationships that might need some work.
All the while, we’ll use methods like learning communication skills, experimenting with gender and sexual identity expression, EMDR , mindfulness, and coping skills to help you feel more at peace and confidence in your LGBTQIA+ identity.
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Brighten and branch out.
Now, we take everything we’ve learned and tried and bring it to the rest of your life.
This stage is often where people see the most growth, as they add and take away from different parts of their lives to create a version of being LGBTQIA+ that feels the best for them.
For you, this could look many different ways, but we’ll find what works best for you.
Therapy for LGBTQIA+ issues can help you:
Cultivate a feeling of acceptance and confidence about your LGBTQIA+ identity.
Resolve trauma related to being LGBTQIA+.
Develop assertiveness skills to set boundaries with unsupportive people..
Explore your gender and sexual identities in safe, judgment-free ways.
Build a collection of coping skills to navigate anxiety around being LGBTQIA+.
Let’s work together to embrace your LGBTQIA+ identity as a wonderful and natural part of who you are.
Let’s work together to embrace your LGBTQIA+ identity as a wonderful and natural part of who you are.
Specialties
Gender and sexual identity exploration
Internalized homophobia and transphobia
LGBTQIA+ related trauma and anxiety
Relationships and communication
Creating and maintaining boundaries
FAQs
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A: Overall, I ensure that I write my documentation with the minimum amount of information possible to convey what happened during the session without compromising sensitive information. For example, if we’re talking about you experimenting with clothes or makeup with being trans, I would phrase it as, “Client discussed identity exploration via self-expression.” I will ask you in our first session how much you would like for me to discuss your LGBTQIA+ identity in your paperwork.
In addition, I do not discuss what we talk about in sessions with outside parties unless you fill out a form that says I can. Even then, I limit the amount of information to the minimum needed.
Maintaining your privacy and confidentiality is easier with self-paying for therapy, as none of the information I write in my documentation goes to your insurance company. If that sounds like a good option to you, let’s schedule a consultation and talk about it further.
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A: No elements of conversion therapy will ever come into our work together. I value your identity and experiences, including your ability to celebrate and express them, above all else. Your identity and experiences do not need to be “fixed.”
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A: Over the years, I have worked in multiple settings to help LGBTQIA+ folks, including small rural towns, universities, and community mental health centers. I’ve worked with clients who identify as polyamorous, bisexual, transgender and nonbinary, lesbian, gay, and so on with issues ranging from navigating relationships to exploring their identity. Schedule a consultation and see if I can help you with your own LGBTQIA+ journey.
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A: If you haven’t been raised or taught how to understand your LGBTQIA+ loved one, it can be difficult to understand. Often what we believe about being LGBTQIA+ comes from our upbringing and is often influenced by the generations before us and what they believed, too.
If you want to support your loved one, some great tips are to notice where your beliefs come from (mom, dad, grandma, religion?), listen to your loved one and what their experience is like, and recognize that even if you can’t fully understand what they’re experiencing, you can still love them for who they are.
If this is something that sounds difficult for you to do but you really want to provide better support for your loved one, call for a consultation.
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A: I am not trained in providing couple’s counseling. However, if there are times where you would like some extra support in bringing up something to a partner or a loved one, I am more than happy to offer space for that! If you’re specifically looking for couple’s counseling, there are other providers you can search for to find that.